“Just go with the flow.” This is the unwritten rule that many believe is the way to get by in today’s society, a place where people are puppets to peer pressure and are afraid to stand out. However, what good is conformity really? How can accepting what other people establish help us to find out who we are and what roles we play in society? And if we’re just going with the flow, are we really reaching our full potential for success? The answer is simple: conformity fails us. It is a force that drags us through life without allowing us to stand on our own two feet. Society is filled with age-old prejudices, stereotypes, and commonly accepted beliefs, but we must all strive to be “establish-ers”, not “accept-ers”; we must be people who can think and act for themselves rather than blindly follow others. By challenging societal standards and maintaining our individuality, we can achieve levels of success that are unattainable by simply conforming.
While there are varying degrees and forms of “success”, one of the most common types of success that come to mind to many is personal success. To that end, challenging societal standards can help people achieve personal successes; this holds especially important when it comes to disadvantaged societies, because it has been seen time and time again that children who grow up in such societies are negatively impacted by the poor existing standards. For instance, in the novel Bodega Dreams by Ernesto Quinonez, Sapo is a character who lived in Spanish Harlem for all his life and was hurt by the circumstances of his environment, which included the neglect of Latino children and the common practice of doing drugs; in fact, as a student at Julia de Burgos, one teacher even told Sapo “[he’d] be lucky to even make jail] (Quinonez 90)”. Swept away by what was considered “normal” to the people around him, Sapo was molded into a poor adulthood as a drug lord who was so lost in this cycle of darkness to the point where he could neither see a better future nor escape his current reality. Sapo would spend the entirety of his life flying kites with Gillette blades that could “cut the strings of other people’s kites in midair” (10); he would never soar like a true kite, but rather, he would always bring himself and others down like the Gillette blades lining the string.
Similarly, two men, both named Wes Moore, were negatively influenced by their disadvantaged environments as well. As children, both Moores grew up in poor, drug-ravaged neighborhoods; to make matters worse, one of the Moores also lost his father — a “disoriented, disheveled black man” (Kristof, par. 6) — at a young age. Consequently, the Moores started down the wrong path, getting “caught in a whirlpool of poverty, broken families, failed schools and self-destructive behavior that is replicated generation after generation” (Kristof, par. 4). They ran into difficulties in school, clashed with authority, and often got themselves in handcuffs, among other issues. One of the Wes Moores continued to follow the violent standards of his society and ran into big-time trouble: he was charged with the first-degree murder of a police officer and father of five, and at the age of 33 he became a grandfather. He epitomizes the powerful and dangerous effects of a rough childhood environment. On the other hand, the other Wes Moore became a Rhodes scholar from Johns Hopkins University; however, this is due to the fact that attending military school after his earlier misdemeanor helped him to cut his connections with his childhood environment. It is challenging his society’s norms and breaking free from the violent, illegal activities that were common practice which ultimately allowed him to end up differently than the incarcerated Wes Moore.
The Rhodes scholar Wes Moore is proof that there is still hope for those who grow up in disadvantaged environments. By refusing to conform to the poor practices that their societies endorse, people can rise above their circumstances; had society’s view of Latino children angered or inspired him into proving the stereotype wrong, Sapo might have worked towards success, whether that be continuing schooling or getting a job. Granted, going against the norms that everyone in society follows is no easy feat, but with enough drive and determination, it can be done. For example, Liz Murray grew up with two drug addicted parents and lost her mother at a young age to HIV. She became homeless at the age of 16, and while her father entered a homeless shelter and her sister stayed with a friend, Murray slept in 24-hour underground train cars or park benches “[eating[ ice cubes because it felt like eating” (Walters, par. 2). Her childhood was one with little support and much darkness. Nevertheless, Murray did not pity herself or see herself as a victim for long; she quickly became determined to “fix [her] life someday … [she] knew [her] time was now or maybe never” (Walters, par. 8). To that end, Murray fought to not give up on her education, eventually graduating high school in two years as a straight-A student after doing a year’s worth of work each semester and attending night classes. When a teacher who recognized her talents introduced her to Harvard University, Murray decided that the school was within reach. All of her hard work paid off when she was ultimately accepted to and attended Harvard University on a New York Times scholarship. As someone who truly went from homeless to Harvard while minimal support from others, Murray is the ultimate example of someone whose refusal to conform with society led to tremendous success. After all, had Murray followed the examples set by her parents, she certainly would not have ended up as a Harvard graduate. She is a product of her environment in the best sense — her poor environment shaped her into a better person.
Personal success, however, is only one end of the spectrum of success. Success can also come in the form of positively influencing on one’s community. To this end, challenging societal standards can enable people to have a powerful impact on their environments and the people around them. For instance, Spanglish, a “broken mix of Spanish and English”, provides a way for Latinos to preserve and raise awareness of their culture. While Spanglish originally rose to popularity because it is a way for Latinos who experience a language barrier — especially older and younger generations — to maintain communication, today it also helps is “a tool of empowerment” (Newseek, Staff, par. 12), a way of being both American and Spanish, a way for Latinos to go against the idea that all immigrants must completely assimilate. By allowing Latinos to live in the United States while still keeping their culture and community close, Spanglish is significant to the U.S.’ societal dynamic, challenging norms and bringing to light the fact that our country is a melting pot of diverse immigrants to the point where it is predicted that by the year 2044, white Americans will lose their majority status to the growing number of minorities. While there are undoubtedly controversies that revolve around Spanglish (who has the “right” to speak Spanglish? Does Spanglish undermine traditional Spanish? Are Latinos isolating themselves too far from the rest of society by not learning English?), using Spanglish is still clearly a powerful means by which Latinos can boldly assert their cultural identity in society.
This concept of challenging and thereby influencing society is also prominent in Bodega Dreams through the main character, Bodega, who has a uniquely hopeful and ambitious dream that the Latinos of Spanish Harlem will rise to success. Despite what others think and say about Spanish Harlem and its desperate — seemingly hopeless — conditions, Bodega remains persistent and does not give up hope; while he ultimately dies towards the end of the novel, his dream serves as inspiration for future generations. Bodega is a blatant testament to the fact that making an effort to defy norms and challenge wrongful perceptions that society holds is hugely impactful. Bodega has an especially powerful influence on Chino, who likely ends up taking over Bodega’s role at the end of the novel upon realizing, “[Bodega’s] hopes [are] bigger than [him], more important than any one person. If those dreams of [his] would take off, El Barrio would burn like a roman candle, bright and proud for decades” (Quinonez 107). Chino aptly explains the potential that Bodega’s dream brings to Spanish Harlem.
In a society that constantly practices and encourages conformity, it takes guts and courage to challenge norms. However, there are many valuable benefits that can be reaped from pushing existing boundaries, ranging from personal successes to more large-scale successes that involve influencing the community/people around you. Furthermore, if we all make an effort to make our unique voices heard, we open up dialogue between different people on a wide range of issues; the resulting “clash” of opinions not only makes for an interesting world to live in, but also is one of the most important aspects of a healthy and functioning democracy. Therefore, in order to both improve ourselves and fulfill our responsibility to be significant, active members of our society, we must seek to challenge existing standards — as intimidating and unbreakable as they seem, it is these commonalities, stereotypes, and status quo-esque features of society that hinder our ability to reach out full capabilities.
Works Cited
Kristof, Nicholas. “Two Men and Two Paths.” The New York Times, The New York Times, 12 June 2010, www.nytimes.com/2010/06/13/opinion/13kristof.html?mtrref=undefined&gwh=BFCA054786927E1ADA67893AD8448D7B&gwt=pay.Newsweek. “The Meaning Of Spanglish.” Newsweek, 14 Mar. 2010, www.newsweek.com/meaning-spanglish-136491.Quiñonez Ernesto. Bodega Dreams. Vintage Contemporaries/Vintage Books, a Division of Penguin Random House, LLC, 2018.Walters, Joanna. “Liz Murray: ‘My Parents Were Desperate Drug Addicts. I’m a Harvard Graduate’.” The Guardian, Guardian News and Media, 25 Sept. 2010, www.theguardian.com/world/2010/sep/26/liz-murray-bronx-harvard.
Leave a Comment!
